I noticed quite a few GoodFathers in the news this week, so I thought I better highlight the rare coverage! This week’s “dad news” includes:

• The Today Show featured Aaron Rochlen and Brian Reid (of RebelDad.com) in a parenting piece which focused on stay-at-home-dads. It was given the unfortunate title “Meet Mr.Mom“, but I guess we’ll need to give them points for covering the topic. (more)

• The UK’s Medical News Today reports that maternity services throughout the UK are ’shutting out’ fathers from their children’s birth. (more)

• InteractiveDad.com launches InteractiveDadTV.com making it the first syndicated news franchise created specifically for fathers. (more)

• The San Jose Mercury News describes the new over-the-counter DNA paternity tests now on sale in Rite Aid stores in 30 US states. (more)

• The Financial Mail of South Africa covers a recent study showing that 10% of new fathers suffer from some form of postpartum depression. (more)

Did I miss anything dad-worthy? If so, leave a clever comment in the section below to share your daddy news.

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

Hello Dads,

It’s your favorite family man The GoodFather here with a few Valentine’s Day ideas that you’ll be able to work in to your family’s busy Thursday night schedule. With a little preparation, this will be mom’s best Valentine’s Day ever. No, not your mom…I’m talking about your kid’s mom, your wife! Man, I can see that this is going to be harder than I originally thought.

Below you’ll find a few simple ideas to help you get started, but with any luck our readers will add additional tips in our comments section below so check back soon for updates!

• Card from the Kids: It doesn’t take a lot of money to melt your Valentine’s heart, and this great hack from Parent Hacks proves it. Make a huge cardboard heart and cut a large hole out of the center. Let the kids decorate the heart and then take their picture with their heads poking out of the center. The end result can be the perfect cover for a home-made card, or frame it with a bright red picture frame.

• Card from Dad (That Would Be You): It may seem a little odd to send your wife mail, but trust me on this one. Receiving a Valentine by mail will be an unexpected (and dare I say “romantic”) surprise, that shows you were thinking of her before the 14th. For delivery, you have two options to make sure it arrives on time (a) mix it in the mail inside your mail box to appear that it was delivered, or (b) drop it off at your local post office two days early for a more official delivery.

• Cook Dinner: It really is the thought that counts, so don’t worry if you aren’t much of a cook. Presentation is everything when it comes to a successful Valentine’s Day dinner, so cook whatever it is that you can make and focus on setting a romantic scene with candle light and the right music. If your kids are young, put a few paper hearts on their bibs and include them on the big dinner event. If your kids are older, make sure you feed them before mom is allowed into “Chez Daddy” and let them be the waiting staff for your romantic dinner!

For bonus points, you might want to pick two from the list. I think you’ll find that dinner will go a little smoother when mom has already received a Valentine earlier in the day. If she goes the entire day without a card or flowers, she might think that you forgot!

Do you have any Valentine’s Day tips for dads? If so, please share them with us using the comments section below.

Happy Valentine’s Day!
The GoodFather

Dear Dr.MOZ,

I hope this isn’t too “girly” for the GoodFather, but I have an odd one for him. My wife and I are throwing a baby shower and we’re making a diaper cake as a centerpiece for the party. I just learned that this isn’t an actual cake that you eat, so you can probably guess why I’m writing. I see diaper cakes for sale online, but I haven’t found simple directions for building one. Any advice for a first-time diaper cake designer GoodFather?

Thanks,
Ray

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It takes guts to ask another man how to make a diaper cake Ray. Thankfully, you’ve come to the right guy. Creating a diaper cake is more of an art than a construction job, and between you and me…I’ve built diaper cakes that have made grown men weep. After visiting the “how to links below, go through my tips on Dear Dr.MOZ for building the perfect diaper cake:

• WikiHow Diaper Cake Directions: This is a great “how to” with step-by-step instructions, useful tips, and pictures for those that may have never seen a diaper cake in real life.

• Buzzle, No Frills Directions: Here’s a no nonsense list of instructions from Buzzle that you might find useful. It doesn’t include pictures, but you probably won’t need any after visiting the previous WikiHow link. The writer mentions the use of tape and glue, but visit my tips list to see why you’ll want to use rubber bands and ribbon instead.

• Inspiration: Anytime you are about to start a new project like this, it is always a good idea to look to an online photo site like Flickr for inspiration. Your first baby cake may not look as fancy as those created by the seasoned pros, but pick a few favorite cakes from the collection and try to incorporate some of their bells and whistles on your own cake.

Thanks for the question Ray. It’s great to hear that GoodFathers are finally invited to baby showers AND stepping up to their diaper cakes like real men!

Your favorite family man,

The GoodFather

Dear Dr.MOZ,

We just had our second child (baby girl) and was curious to know if the GoodFather had any advice for the new “big sister”. She is two years old and we would like to know what we could do to continue to make her feel special with so much attention being given to the baby.

Thanks Doc!
Jay in Boston

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Hi Jay, the GoodFather here. This is a great question that many GoodFathers face at one time or another. This an important time for you and your family, so I brought in a few of my associates at the online community of fathers at DaddyDaily.com. Take it away Dads!

DaddyDaily.com: Jay, first of all – CONGRATS on your second baby! Now that you figured it out with having one, the rules will now change – but it is the best experience you will have (until you get to the third). Here are some tips we found that will help the big sister with the transition from being the only one to sharing mommy and daddies attention:

• Gifts for the new baby will be coming from everyone and the big brother/sister can feel left out as the new baby gets all the attention. We always had a stash of wrapped little gifts (ie. Crayons, coloring books, little dolls, etc…) on hand if there were no gifts for the big sister/brother. Usually, people understand and will have a little something for the new big brother/sister, but if they forget this can be helpful.
• When the new baby came home, we gave the big brother/sister a special present from the new baby and thanked them for being a big brother/sister.
• Try to give the new big brother/sister some extra daddy attention and time.
• One great activity is to take the big sister to the book store or library and find books that talk about expecting a new baby. There are a lot of them out there, just browse. This will give the big brother/sister some special time with daddy.
• Let the big brother/sister take part in some of the feedings, diaper changes or baths. When our baby was ready for the bottle, our toddler was always willing to help hold the bottle for the new baby.

There are a lot more, but start out simple and see what works. You know your child the best and can gauge their needs. We hope this helps and as always give ol’ Dr. MOZ a shout with any other questions. All the best from Daddydaily.com!

Don’t forget Jay, this is only Part 2 of our sibling help guide so head over to Dear Dr.MOZ for the Part 1 of this week’s GoodFather Friday.

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

Based on the last few emails that I received from fellow GoodFathers, I can see that everyone has shopping on the brain. You have a lot of people to shop for and only one more week to get it done, so here’s my holiday shopping cheat sheet brought to you by some of the GoodFather’s favorite blogs:

• Newborn and New Mom Gear by Clever Parents: Our very own Kris Jackson of Clever Parents reviews her favorite newborn (and new mom) gear including skin care, diaper bags, organizers, and everything in between!
• Babies and Toddlers by Cool Mom Picks: The two cool moms Kristen and Liz from Cool Mom Picks have unveiled their 2007 Holiday Gift Guide, so what are you waiting for?
• Toddlers to Grandparents by Pinks and Blues: The ladies at Pinks and Blues have done it again and the gift list is so large that we couldn’t fit all the categories in the title. You’ll see that they cover toddlers, grandparents, and everyone else on your list including the family dog!
• Stocking Stuffers by swissmiss: Tina Roth Eisenberg (aka “swissmiss”) is a swiss designer gone NYC. When she’s not running her own design studio, she’s locating the coolest products with the best designs and sharing them on one of her many blogs. This week, swissmiss put together a fun collection of stocking stuffers that you are going to love!

Good luck GoodFathers and remember the promise you made to yourself last year…don’t wait until the 23rd to start your shopping!

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

Dear Dr.MOZ,

My sister and brother-in-law are expecting their first child and I’d like to get them a baby carrier because both mom and dad can use it. People tell me to get one of the Baby Bjorn carriers. I like the way they look, but I’m wondering if they are really worth the money. What can you and the GoodFather tell me about the brand and product features?

Thanks!
Nate

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Hi Nate,

You’ll certainly find cheaper baby carriers on the market, but it is really hard to match the overall quality of a BabyBjörn. The fact is, if you think your sister will use the carrier at all…BabyBjörns are worth every cent. Here are a few features of the BabyBjörn “Active” Carrier:

• Can be worn with children 8-26 pounds. Not all carriers can be used with babies this small.
• Baby can face towards you or away from you (depending on baby’s age/strength). Some carriers require a single position.
• Padded shoulder straps are wide for parents’ comfort. Cheaper carriers are equipped with thin straps with little padding that can dig into shoulders and back for a less comfortable experience.
• An adjustable buckle between legs and a padded headrest that folds allows for a good fit as baby grows.
• Lower back support provides extra comfort for longer wearing. This could be the best back support on any carrier in the market.
• Machine washable which is a big plus!

In a nutshell, you can feel good about buying a BabyBjörn because they are comfortable and functional for parents and babies. There are a few other nice carriers out there like the ERGObaby line and the Red Castle Sport Carriers which are also in the $100 range. Thanks for coming to the GoodFather Nate, your sister will love her baby gift!

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

As you’ll see in today’s GoodFather Friday on Dear Dr.MOZ, Jerry has a baby girl very close to crawling. I provided a few tips for baby proofing his house and for inspiring crawling, but I also wanted to take this opportunity to feature a few fun crawling accessories. The first two knee protectors are by no means a “necessity”, but safety products like the baby gate will definitely need to be ready to go before his daughter is on the move.

• Knee Pads: You’ll find quite a few knee pads on the market, but Snazzy Baby is a favorite. Not only are they comfortable, but they also have non-slip grip to allow for traction on all surfaces from carpet to hardwood floors. (available at Mamas and Munchkins)

• Padded Pants: Another great option can be found with crawling pants by Bees-Knees. They come in sizes from 6-24 months in a collection of fun styles and have plenty of room for cruising. (available at BeesKnees.com)

• Baby Gates: You should always be within grabbing distance of your little crawler, but it never hurts to have the danger zones blocked-off for extra safety. The extra wide soft baby gate by Evenflo is a solid choice for a portable gate. It expands from 38″ to 60″ wide so you’ll find that it helps regulate traffic between rooms with regular doorways and very wide walkways. (found at KidSafe)

Thanks for writing, Jerry and don’t forget to visit Dear Dr.MOZ’s post covering other crawling details. As always, I’d love it if our Clever Parents readers contributed their favorite crawling aids and tips by posting in the comment section below.

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

Dear Dr.MOZ,

I’d love it if you would ask the GoodFather what to do about my toddler throwing things. The flying objects are pretty easy to handle when we are home, but it can be a real nightmare when we are out in the world. He seems to be developing a strong throwing arm and a flying sippy cup or high-speed toy can really do some damage.

Thanks,
Chris

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Hello Chris,

There really isn’t anything quite like a full sippy cup in the back of the head while driving down the highway. Throwing objects is normal for toddlers developing their motor skills, but there certainly is a time and a place for everything. Here are a few ideas and a couple smart products to help minimize the carnage during the next trip:

1. Toddlers Throw Things: First, you need to understand that there’s really nothing you can do to completely stop a toddler from throwing things. It might be frustrating at times, but it is normal for toddlers. Once you accept this fact of life, you are ready for the next step.
2. Plan Ahead: You can do a lot to help yourself when packing for the outside world by only bringing soft toys. A small stuffed animal will do a lot less damage than a wooden toy or hard plastic gadget. This seems obvious, but we tend to pack the “favorite” toys out of instinct and many of them could be heavy. You are probably wondering what to do about bottles and sippy cups right? If so, see the next step.
3. Bottles and Sippy Cups: In the off chance you haven’t see these yet, let me introduce you to The Bottle Tamer. Not only is this simple little invention an easy and safe way to cut down on ugly occurrences including H.S.F.B.s (High-Speed Flying Bottles) in the stroller, but they also work in the car seat and the high chair. Speaking of highchair, see step three.
4. Dinner Time: I know you were interested in throwing things while on the move, but the list wouldn’t be complete without mentioning flying food. There’s nothing quite as satisfying to a toddler than throwing an entire plate or bowl of food across the room. To help give parents the winning edge, products like the stay-put cutlery and bowl sets help keep airborne food to a minimum thanks to suction cups and other smart design features. This may not keep your little one from chucking the food directly from the plate, but rationing the food throughout the meal should help keep losses down.

Thanks for the great question Chris. I hope that one of our tips helps to save a meal, or maybe even a few cracks to the skull from an H.S.F.B!

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

Dear Dr.MOZ and GoodFather,

I have one word for you, and that word is “colic”. Our doctor tells us that our baby girl is healthy, and we’ll just have to try and make her as comfortable as possible until she (we) get through it.

Anything you might have in the GoodFather’s bag of tricks would be great.

Mike

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Hello Mike,

That has to be the shortest question that Dr.MOZ and I have ever seen, and understandably so. A colicky baby will cut new parents’ sleep time down from slim to none, and there’s nothing like sleep deprivation to turn you into a big pile of mush. I’ll throw a few ideas your way, but don’t worry if they don’t automatically show signs of working.

Walk: Get the sling or stroller out and walk your way to a happy baby. The new sights and sounds just might distract her long enough for you to regain your will to live. No? Try the next step.

Water: Many babies are soothed by the sound of water, and parents have found that rocking their babies by the running shower or clothes washer can do the trick. You could also take a shower with her. If you do, make sure your water temperature is safe.

Massage: Some dads are shocked to find that all a baby needs to relax is a belly massage. Use a little warm baby lotion and rub in a clockwise motion around her belly button to fight off that renegade air bubble.

You might also consider experimenting with different forms of feeding and/or swaddling her as seen in the past post “GoodFather’s 5 Step Swaddle Recipe“. As your doctor probably told you, no one really understands what causes colic so it can be difficult to treat it. In the off chance the following ideas don’t always work, stay strong. One day soon, the colic days will be behind her…and then she’ll decide to start throwing things.

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

Dear Dr.MOZ,

I was given a diaper bag as a new dad gift and so I thought I’d check in with the GoodFather and his crew to see what should go in it. I’m guessing that diapers and a bottle will be involved, but the rest is Greek to me. We still have a few weeks to go before the big day, so just tell me what to do and I’ll take care of it. Thanks GoodFather, I’ll owe you one!

Cheers,
NY Daddy

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Hello NY Daddy,

You already have your own diaper bag, so you’re a step ahead of most new dads. I wouldn’t worry about having this bag packed and ready at the hospital (you won’t need it for the ride home), but here’s what you’ll need handy for an average short trip about town.

1. Diapers and bottle (you knew this, but for the record)
2. Changing pad for unpredictable changing in random locations (padded preferred)
3. Wipes (as many as you can carry, you’ll use them all)
4. Diaper Rash Cream
5. Burp Cloth (you’ll need it if you use the bottle)
6. Bib
7. Plastic Bags (2 disposable, 2 watertight for wet clothing)
8. Sunscreen for daytime (hypoallergenic for baby’s sensitive skin)
9. Changes of clothes (trust me, you’ll need these too)
10. Small blanket
11. Hat
12. Washcloth
13. A few small toys and books

I know what you are thinking…this is a lot of baby junk isn’t it? The list might even get a little bigger based on unknowns like the weather and medication, but you’ll survive short trips with the provided list. You might also want to add water and a snack for yourself so you don’t have to make any extra stops from point A to point B. Being a GoodFather is a tough job, but you’re going to love every bit of it!

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

November 3rd is just around the corner, so I wanted to dedicate today’s GoodFather Friday post to planning for the 12th Annual At-Home Dads Convention. Once again, this years convention is hosted by UMKC (University of Missouri at Kansas City) with sessions focused on making at-home father’s job easier.

Expected convention sessions include: Dads with Daughters, Legal Issues for At-Home dads, Recognizing Depression and Isolation, Growing Your At-Home Dad Group, Child Safety, and more! See The GoodFather’s cheat-sheet to help you get started planning below:

• Convention Dates: November 3rd, 2007
• Hotel Information: Hampton Inn on The Country Club Plaza in Kansas City, Missouri. (book rooms online here, or call 1-816-448-4600)
• Official Convention Website: www.athomedadconvention.com
• Official Convention Forum: www.athomedad.org/forums/convention
• Additional Activities: Free Harley Davidson Plant tour (Friday, 11am, first 15 only!) Meet and Greet at Boulevard Brewery (Friday, 6-8pm), Authentic Kansas City BBQ at Smoking Guns BBQ and transportation provided from the hotel at 6:30 (Saturday, 7:30)
• Kansas City Visitor’s Guide: www.visitkc.com

Now jump on those hotel reservations while they are still available GoodFathers, and don’t forget to visit the At-Home Dads Convention Official Website for more!

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

Dear Dr.MOZ,

Here’s a question that I think would be a good fit for the GoodFather this Friday. My wife and I are the first couple from our group of friends to get pregnant and we’re stumped by the baby registry. The car seats and other baby gear are easy enough, but what about the clothing? How much of each type of baby clothing will our newborn daughter actually need?

Thanks for the advice GoodFather!

Yours,
Cliff

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Hello Cliff,

You’ll hear a lot of different opinions when it comes to how many of each type of baby clothing you’ll need, but it really comes down to how much laundry you can stand to do. On the other hand, your newborn will quickly outgrow most outfits so you don’t want to buy out the baby store quite yet. Here’s my list of newborn clothing essentials that every GoodFather should have ready by his baby’s birth. The list may change slightly depending on where you live and the particular season your baby is born, but this is a great primer for a baby registry.

General Clothing:

• 6 or more side snap shirts
• 8-10 bodysuits or “onesies”
• 2-3 layette gowns
• 5-7 one piece pajamas (sleepers)
• 6 pairs of pants
• 1 snow suit (if season permits)
• 1 sweater

Shoes and Hats:

• 1 newborn hat (for warmth, and to hide your baby’s football-shaped head…you’ll see)
• 2 bootie sets (they are small, you’ll lose them before the end of the week)

Additional Clothing:

• 1 cotton baby blanket
• 3 dozen diapers minimum (fewer if you have arranged diaper service)
• 12 burp cloths
• 2 receiving blankets

Good luck with your new role as “GoodFather” Cliff. Dr.MOZ and I will both be here to help out in the future, so don’t be a stranger!

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather

Dear Dr.MOZ,

Thanks for the help!
Craig

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Hello Craig,

I’m always proud to see a soon-to-be GoodFather brushing up on his skills before the big day! It’s true, there are a few ways to do it but here’s my favorite 5 step method with illustrations help achieve super “swaddledom” GoodFather style.

1) Fold one of the corners down on a receiving blanket. Your baby should be positioned in the middle of the blanket with the top of the blanket laying at the top of his shoulders.

2) Now fold the left side of the receiving blanket firmly across his chest with his right arm wrapped comfortably to his body. With his left arm lifted, tuck the blanket under his body so the wrap is slightly firm, but not tight.

3) Pull the bottom of the blanket up and tuck it into the first fold.

4) Put your baby’s left arm at a comfortable spot on his body and wrap the remaining blanket corner across his chest.

5) Again, tuck the blanket to create firm (but not tight) wrap. Some babies like their arms to be free (you’ll know because he’ll become fussy and uncomfortable after this step) so see the arm-out variation image.

That’s really all there is to it. You’ll second-guess your work and re-tuck a few times fearing that you’ve made it too tight, but just pay attention to your baby’s cues and you’ll do fine. Thanks for the question Craig…I can see you are on the right path to becoming a GoodFather!

Yours,

The GoodFather

Dear Dr.MOZ,

Thanks,
Julie

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Hello Julie,

It’s true, most guys find it hard to get excited when it comes to the usual pink and blue baby stuff. It’s not that men don’t like cute things, but babies are already cute on their own so why not mix a little cool with the cute? Here are a few fitting gift ideas that I think will hit the spot:

* Camo Diaper Shirt and Booties: Now what could be better for your little outdoorsman than this camo get-up? Whatever you do, don’t put him down and let him crawl outside. With this camo shirt and bootie ensemble, you may never see him again. (camo shirt and booties available at CoolBaby Clothing)

* Sleep Thief Infant Playsuit: This stylish onepiece by No Added Sugar will be the perfect playsuit for a policeman’s son. Made with nickel-free snaps along the inside legs, Mr. Macho will have baby changed and be back to bed after another mission from diaper duty before you know it! (playsuit available at Panda Park)

* Dress Blue Baby Bib: Dad’s little leatherneck may spit, fling, and throw food, but he might as well look good doing it in his machine-washable dress blue baby bib. (Marine bib available at Sgt. Grit)

Thanks for bringing your question to the GoodFather Julie, and special thanks to our friends at Clever Parents for extending GoodFather Fridays to their fantastic online community!

Your favorite family man,
The GoodFather